What if Saki and Muraki got along?
Brotherly Love
It’s a reunion twenty years overdue, somewhere between a few actual murders, an attempted murder, one mechanical eye, a one-way flight out of the country, vampires, semi-zombies, a blonde porcelain doll named Veronica, and a man with purple eyes that just won’t seem to hold still.
The results, of course, are spectacular.
“Saki?”
“Kazutaka?”
And not exactly what you might have expected.
Somewhere in Kyoto, there’s a place you may have been to before, if you’re assiduous in keeping up with the local gossip. In fact, one may say that it’s a hub of goings-on. Its Tokyo branch is a plush and elegant affair, lovely enough to tempt young men into taking their princesses out to dinner. The Kyoto branch, however, functions more as a bar and less as a restaurant, having been strongly outshone by its neighbor with the similar name.
Welcome to Kokakuran. Please do not confuse it with its eastern neighbor.
This place is, in fact, a dive. However, due to some particularly curious geographic sentiments, it’s also a safe haven.
“Sensei!” The voice is poignant with regret. “Why did you have to…have to do that?”
“That?” The bartender looks up. For purposes of identification, he will henceforth be referred to as ‘Jimmy.’ That may or may not be his real name.
“That! Oh, and another shot, please, sir.” The young man slumps against the surprisingly clean surface of the wooden bar and raises his glass for a refill. “I’ll need it, to erase what I just saw.”
“What did you see?” Jimmy asks while he pours the young man a double. He thinks that the young man is as pale as if he’s seen a ghost.
“Oh, my former employer and his current brother…One should be dead and the other shouldn’t be, but now they’re both supposed to be dead…and…oh, I don’t understand it anymore!” The young man takes a long drink, and then chokes on the fiery spirit.
“Easy there. Ghosts are nothing to be afraid of,” Jimmy says. “Why, just the other day I saw a programme about it on the telly.” For purposes of identification, Jimmy is also not a Brit, nor should he be spelling like one. “Were they flitting about? Chasing you around with promises of vengeance?”
“No, it was worse. Much worse!” The young man is disconsolate, staring at the melting ice of his drink. The ice clinks uncaringly. “They were…both of them…were doing something to the young master. Something perverse…with ropes and nudity and pulleys.”
“What happened?”
The young man buries his face in his arms, as if he could use that as a means of disappearing. The answer’s so muffled that the bartender isn’t certain that he hears it correctly. “…I thought it was…really hot…”
Meanwhile…
In the afterlife called Meifu, there is an agency that evaluates the sins and good deeds of people when they were once alive.
Currently, this agency is having a crisis. Mainly because its staff appears to have completely disappeared.
“Excuse me? Aren’t we supposed to be working today?” Chief Konoe walks around the offices, room by room. “Hello? It’s Monday…”
But it’s empty. Even the library.
Tousled dark brown hair.
Currently bloodshot blue eyes.
He’s walking funny?
Two chickens, an empath, and a shadow user walk into a bar.
Into Kokakuran (not to be confused with its illustrious neighbor), to be precise, where Sakaki sits at its lonesome bar drinking. This particular young man has recently suffered the loss of his livelihood as well as the gain of secondhand carnal knowledge.
In contrast, the new guests of this dubious bar have brought with them further knowledge – firsthand, if you will, of the doings and done-ings that have been taking place in all corners of the world.
It appears that somewhere between Muraki’s predilection for domination through bondage, and Saki’s inexhaustible understanding of human biochemistry, nothing, nowhere, and no one between Heaven and Hell (quite literally) is safe.
Well, no one, except in this odd little corner of the universe, where, somewhere between lay lines and kekkais and well-placed Starbucks, all are safe from the ravages of pesky humans and Shinigami alike.
“Thank you, Kurosaki-kun, for finding this safe place,” Tatsumi pants, as he stumbles through the doorway, Hisoka leaning heavily into him. “Had it not been for your interest in obscure texts, more could have been…”
“It’s okay, Tatsumi-san. You don’t have to say it. I understand. Remember, I was there when it happened,” Hisoka says, wincing, as he hobbles his way over to the bar. The humanoid chickens are silent, stunned into some sort of shell-shocked state as they hover and float along shakily after Hisoka.
Sakaki turns his head to the newcomers. If he appears to recognize these newcomers, please pretend that it makes sense.
“Oh, it’s you!” Sakaki looks puzzled. “But I thought you two were…”
“Back home, safe and sound? Not since *those two* decided to kiss and make up,” Tatsumi says, easing what appears to be a tender backside onto a barstool. Eventually, he gives up trying to sit, and instead leans against the sturdy wood of the bar.
“He isn’t joking when he says, ‘kiss’ either,” Hisoka adds. “They’re total sluts. Even with each other.”
“Sensei? A slut?” Sakaki doesn’t seem to look fazed. “Somehow I can see that. When I think about it, there were always signs. Like that giant party-sized jug of lube.”
For a moment, no one else knows what to say.
“It’s horrible!” The elder Gushoushin collapses onto the countertop, tail feathers awry. “I think they’re trying to take over the world!”
“No one’s safe no one’s safe no one’s safe no one’s safe…” The younger trails off, rocking himself back and forth, broken pinfeathers scattering when he shivers.
“Even Tsuzuki can’t fight them,” Hisoka adds sadly. “When he calls his shikigami, they molest them too.”
“All twelve,” Tatsumi says, bewildered. “Don’t even ask me how they did it – it took the better part of a day. Even Tenkuu, the building, wasn’t safe.”
“All twelve…” Sakaki shakes his head. “Where is Tsuzuki-san now?”
“Don’t ask,” came the response, this time simultaneous from both Hisoka and Tatsumi.
“That…that’s awful,” Sakaki says.
“Tell me about it,” Tatsumi says. “We’re just lucky that they grew bored and left for Chijou for a while. I wonder where they could be.”
Sakaki gets a sudden twinge of guilt, remembering why he was in Kokakuran instead of Kokakurou. “They’re at Kokakurou. Oh, I’m such a coward! I ran when I saw what they were doing to Oriya-san.” Sakaki stares mournfully at his feet.
“It’s okay,” Hisoka says to Sakaki. “Just be glad you came out safe. Oriya will be fine.”
There’s a fairly long silence in which our forgotten bartender Jimmy lays out fresh glasses. “Excuse me, gentlemen, but can someone vouch for this kid?” Jimmy says, gesturing at Hisoka. “It’s against the law to serve alcohol to minors.”
“I can vouch for everyone,” Tatsumi says. “Please pour us all a round of whiskey.” Hisoka gives Jimmy an odd look as he pours small glasses for the Gushoushin.
“What? It’s not against the law to serve chickens booze.”
Glasses of whiskey on ice are passed out and drunk, with the expected choking and coughing that follows.
“Now that I think about it, Tatsumi-san,” Hisoka says, after a healthy bout of sputtering at the strong liquor, “where are the others?”
“Others? My guess is that they’re either hiding or have escaped.”
“Where could they go that would be safe?” Hisoka asks.
Tatsumi shakes his head. “I genuinely don’t know anymore, Kurosaki-kun. Hokkaido perhaps?”
At that moment, the door to Kokakuran flings open, and two dreaded figures darken its doorstep. One tall and dark, the other tall and pale, both ready to administer their brand of justice upon the world.
“Prepare for trouble…”
“…And make it double.”
Instantly, there’s a scramble in which various barstools are toppled, glasses flung, and chickens clutched.
“You didn’t think that you could hide from us here, did you, Sakaki-san?” Saki says with a wry smile.
“Really, Saki, you know that he didn’t mean to run away,” Muraki says soothingly. “Don’t you want to assist me, Sakaki-kun? I know you’re just a little nervous.”
Sakaki looks torn. He stands frozen with fear, like a rabbit caught between two panthers. “I…no, Sensei, I want to help, it’s just that…”
Of course, it gets more complex.
“Hold it, right there!” A girl’s voice interrupts. She’s joined by another of similar height, both of them petite and delicate creatures. Their silhouettes hold in the doorway for a moment before stepping through.
“Yuma! Saya!” Tatsumi’s eyes grow wide. “What are you two doing here?”
“We heard about your problems, and we’re here to help out!” Yuma says defiantly as she barges up to Muraki and Saki, who are looking completely stunned.
“Wakaba and Terazuma came to us at the first sign of trouble,” Saya explains while she follows in Yuma’s wake, moving off to one side as if to corral the brothers and keep them from escaping.
“You two?” Muraki raises a skeptical eyebrow. “I can hardly think that the two of you are up to stopping the two of us.”
“Not unless, of course, you would like to spend some time together in private,” Saki says charmingly.
“Not a chance, villains! Take that! Ten Thousand Ribbons of the Pink House Attack!”
And so, once more, the day is saved from the ravages of Team Brotherly Love, thanks to Yuma and Saya, with a little help from a deadly combination of genki, kawaii, and crossdressing.
End! Thank you for reading! Chapter 9 to come soon…
Eyecatch, from the proofreader’s comments:
<< Curiosity takes me to a bad place, and I decide to see if I can figure out why he’s like that, so hesitantly, I extend my senses further, just a bit. <<
Aeanagwen: *snickers* Show us on the doll where he touched you, Hisoka-kun.
Chapter 1 | Chapter
2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter
4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter
6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter
8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter
10 | Epilogue
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